If you’re suffering from a resolution to get more exercise, I would direct you to yoga. Yoga is, without a doubt, the very sexiest of floor exercises. (Sorry, calisthenics.) There are candles, blankets, and the occasional hot guy doing Cobra position. Plus, approximately 80 percent of yoga poses look like sex positions anyway, especially that one Cat/Cow pose. So do what the great yogic masters obviously intended and put these five yoga positions to use as super hot sex positions.
1 DOWNWARD DOGGY STYLE
Downward Dog looks pretty much like the international symbol for Take Me From Behind. Start in push-up position to place your hands and feet, then bend your ass up into the air, making a straight line from your wrists, through your head and back, up to your butt. Get crazy by spreading your legs farther apart to let him in even deeper. You can also bend your legs for height adjustment (or if you’re just tired because, christ, you just started taking yoga a couple weeks ago and now this.) Worth it, though, for the insanely … deep … penetration.
2 THE BRIDGE OF MOANS
This is pretty easy for both of you, but it seems like you’re doing something badass and complex. Lie on your back with your knees bent up and your feet a foot or two apart. Then raise your hips up, and have him kneel between your legs and thrust away. The angle of your elevated hips has his penis stroking the super-sensitive top of your vagina. Bonus move: Open and shut your legs to feel yourself tighten around him. Add some well-timed Kegel squeezes and you’ll both be ready to explode.
3 FIFTY SHADES OF VINYASA
In case you’re still not sold on the idea that yoga is kind of delightfully pervy, consider Reclining Bound Angle Pose: You’re on your back, your legs are butterflied open, and the word “bound” is right there in the name. Take the bound part seriously and have him tie your wrists and have his way with you. Or, if you’re not quite there yet, let him hold down your wrists and allow yourself to be a little vulnerable. Or switch places and tie his ass up while you bone him cowgirl-style. (Not literally his ass though, obviously.)
4 THE PEACEFUL PLOW
Plow pose “invigorates and renews the whole body,” especially if you sass it up a bit. Lie on your back, and have him kneel over your head with his knees touching your shoulders, facing your feet. Then pull your legs up over your head and around his hips, letting him enter you from there. Feel free to bend your knees to add an animalistic vibe to the proceedings. (Note: Plow is semi-advanced, so have him be super gentle, and mind your neck! No hard fucking here.)
5 THE THUNDERBOLT OF LOVE
In Thunderbolt Pose, also called VAJ-rasana (heh), the guy can do the pose. Fear not, it’s barely a pose — he folds his legs under him and sits back on his feet while you hop aboard cowgirl-style and ride his, you know, thunderbolt. Somewhere in there, climb off and give him the primal male pleasure that is breast sex (lube your boobs, squeeze them around his penis and rub them up and down the shaft and around the head.) Guaranteed future masturbation fodder for him and, if you pop a little bullet vibe between your legs while you do it, not so bad for you either.